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Jun. 28th, 2006 05:49 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
xiphiasOne advantage in dealing with my depression is that I have is that I've been depressed for a long time.
You may think that that doesn't sound like a very great advantage.
And you'd be right.
But nonetheless, it is an advantage.
Because when I have a day in which I feel like everything sucks, like I feel like I should just give up on everything I'm trying to do because it's all worthless, when I really don't even quite have it in me to get dressed, I know that it's not real. I know that things AREN'T as hopeless as they feel, that I'm NOT as worthless as I feel, and I know that tomorrow will be different.
If I didn't have experience with this, I might think it was real.
As it is, I know that today was a loss. Nothing got done, nothing went forward. But I know that nothing got UNDONE, either. I didn't make progress, but I didn't regress.
And tomorrow will be better.
You may think that that doesn't sound like a very great advantage.
And you'd be right.
But nonetheless, it is an advantage.
Because when I have a day in which I feel like everything sucks, like I feel like I should just give up on everything I'm trying to do because it's all worthless, when I really don't even quite have it in me to get dressed, I know that it's not real. I know that things AREN'T as hopeless as they feel, that I'm NOT as worthless as I feel, and I know that tomorrow will be different.
If I didn't have experience with this, I might think it was real.
As it is, I know that today was a loss. Nothing got done, nothing went forward. But I know that nothing got UNDONE, either. I didn't make progress, but I didn't regress.
And tomorrow will be better.
