(no subject)

[xiphias]

There are a lot of good things about working Massage Den, of course. One of them is that, well, I like giving massages. Otherwise I wouldn't work Massage Den. And, well, it's really nice having a universally appreciated job. I mean, people see the staff ribbon on my badge, and ask where I'm working, and I say "Massage Den", and they really seem pleased that such a thing exists. That's cool. And Crystal does do her damnedest to make sure that we all don't burn out. I'm just grumpy because I'm usually grumpy after cons.

There's something about the particular way in which I'm introverted which doesn't work well with cons. I mean, I'm people-needy, in general -- I need social contact. With, specifically, the kinds of people who go to cons. And so I've got this feeling like there are all these people around me who I SHOULD be interacting with, and I don't. Mostly, at cons, I spend a lot of time wandering around aimlessly. That's one of the reasons I'm really glad to work Massage Den, because it structures a lot of my time, leaving me with less aimless wandering time.

But it also means that I've got less time to do whatever it is that I go to cons to do, even though I've never quite figured out whatever that is, which is why I spend that time wandering aimlessly, looking for whatever it is.

Comments

Just a Theory

[(Anonymous)]

Perhaps what you are looking for is interaction with individuals and small groups, not with a large group of Fen as at a con.

Something like that happened to me. I ran into a couple of people I wanted to hang out with, who looked like they were free to hang out. One of them I see face to face maybe once a year, at Arisia.

But... I wanted to hang out with them in as a small group in a quiet hotel room, not as a small unit of a larger group in a noisy con hallway. And this is true even though the larger group I'm talking about wasn't the entire con, but only the people on dealers row.

I did have a quiet hotel room that I could have offered... but, I was with another small unit of the larger group at the time, and I had social obligations to them.

It's kind of odd... I didn't have to stay with social unit A (who I came in with) all the time. I could go off and talk to social unit B. But only as long as social unit B remained a part of the larger group (in this case "people on dealer's row"). I could also have made arrangements with social unit A ("I'm going back to the hotel room") but in this particular case it would have resulted in unreasonably long discussions of social arrangements, which was a time drain that one of our members couldn't afford.

What I'm trying to say is this... If it hadn't been a con, I wouldn't have had a chance to interact with this person at all. But, because it was a con, I didn't get the chance to really interact... that is to get the interaction I wanted / needed. Which is frustrating...

I don't know if it's the same frustration that you are feeling, but seems similar. So, I sympathize.

Kiralee

[msmidge.livejournal.com]

There's something about the particular way in which I'm introverted which doesn't work well with cons. I mean, I'm people-needy, in general -- I need social contact. With, specifically, the kinds of people who go to cons. And so I've got this feeling like there are all these people around me who I SHOULD be interacting with, and I don't. Mostly, at cons, I spend a lot of time wandering around aimlessly.

Me too, except not at cons, because I don't really go to them. More like at school parties--or even parties at my own house, actually.

[navrins]

That's sort of why I don't go to Arisia, even though it seems like something I ought to enjoy (based on the evidence of so many people who enjoy many of the same things I do enjoying it). But the one time I went, I couldn't figure out what it was I was there to do, or how to do it, so it wasn't much fun, and I don't know how to do it differently.

[ckd]

I recognize some of this in my own experience of this Arisia, but I'm not sure exactly how it differs, and why I felt it less at Boskone and Worldcon last year (I didn't go to Arisia last year). I don't think it's something Arisia-specific or anything like that, since I do feel it at other cons, but I'm still trying to figure out why I felt it more. The loss of my Sunday at the con certainly contributed to a feeling of disappointment, but it's hard to blame that for feeling at loose ends Friday!

The "wandering aimlessly" thing I definitely recognize. It's not because there weren't people I wanted to see & hang out with (and many I didn't even get to see, partially because of my truncated con and partially because I was spending a lot of time gaming). If I figure out why I do it, I'll let you know in hopes that it helps you figure out why you do it.

This post's made me think, and I'll probably wind up posting an "aftermath/thoughts" entry on DAG to help me organize the thoughts, since it seemed to help when I did it for Worldcon. (That'll also keep me from spamming your comments page; apologies for the extra post.)

[nolly.livejournal.com]

I totally empathize with the "staffing to increase structure" perspective. it's part of why I work cons, too -- that, and a lot of the people I want to see at-con are also con staff and concomm, so working means I see more of them. I tend to work things that mean lots of interaction, like reg, or things that mean sitting in the main thoroughfares, like info desk or volunteers, or just sitting a fan table for another con I'll be working.